Monday, October 20, 2014

DREAM DECOR

I have fallen in completely head-over-heels in love... with a dining table. Do I need, have anywhere to put, or can afford a dining table? No. But if I did, I would immediately be ordering this lovely piece of furniture from Crate and Barrel. Oh, and the awesome blue Thonet-style chairs to go with it.

crate and barrel dining

The table comes in a few different sizes, so if you need and can afford this beautiful table, please go buy it and invite me over for dinner! (I'll bring the dinner!)

p.s. I think it would make an amazing desk too! I am currently picturing how amazing it would look with a beautiful wingback chair. 

Friday, October 17, 2014

GOOD VIBES ONLY

If you follow me on instagram, you have probably seen my gallery wall. One of my favorite pieces is a custom prinShay did for me with her amazing watercolor skills. (I also have another one not in the gallery wall.) If you love it as much as I do, today is your lucky day because Shay has finally opened her shop! She has a bunch of other beautiful prints as well! Please go check out her shop and support this awesome, talented and hilarious girl that I am lucky to call my friend.


Wednesday, October 15, 2014

ONE YEAR

One year ago today my mother was officially diagnosed with breast cancer. I can remember what both of us were wearing as we heard the news, down to the nail polish. It felt as if the floor had dropped out from under us and we were just hanging there waiting for someone to wake up from this nightmare. I remember the day that she told me she found the lump and was calling the doctor, October 1st, the first day of Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I remember the day of her surgery, the day she came home, and the first day she felt "normal" after her surgery. I have pictures from the day we took family pictures, before she started chemotherapy and still felt "normal." We sent out our first Christmas card with that picture on it. I remember the day she started chemo. We brought her laptop and were looking at houses in Austin, something we always do when we need a pick-me-up. I kept pointing out ones that would be great for future holidays, a backyard big enough for a wedding, and rooms for her future grandchildren to play in. I remember doing Christmas shopping for her because she was not allowed to go to any stores. All she wanted for Christmas was for her hair to not fall out until after Christmas. I know the day her hair started to fall out, the day she shaved her head, and the day got a wig. I can recount the entire conversation we had when I told her I was going to shave my head too, the anger she had because I had hair, and the love she felt since I was willing to give it all away so she did not feel alone. She did not let me shave my head, but we compromised with shorter hair. I know the day her father died, and the heartache she felt not being allowed to go to the hospital to see him before, the hopelessness of not being able to take care of her mother, and the guilt of having to ask me to take care of her mother. I watched her the day her best friend's mother died, and the sadness knowing she would not be able to go to the funeral to support her best friend, who had spent the last few months supporting her. I can remember the day she did not know me, or anyone else. My entire family, her mother, her sister, her childhood best friend, and the two best friends she has had for over 15 years were all sitting at the table. All she knew was that we were friendly faces, but if you asked her, she would not have been able to tell you that I was her daughter, my name or anything about me. She sat there and didn't know any of us. She could not form words to answer our questions because there were none left in her brain. That was the scariest day of all of our lives, thinking the cancer and the chemotherapy were beating her, thinking that we were going to lose her. 

One year later. She is done with chemotherapy and done with radiation. Her hair is growing back. She stopped wearing the wig, and donated all of them. We baked cakes for the lovely nurses she had during chemotherapy. She bought a new dress and danced at a two weddings. We went to a concert, the ban of crowds finally lifted. We celebrated her 56th birthday. We still don't know if she beat the cancer completely but for right now, the fight is over. We are moving on and making new memories. Some good, some bad but the most important thing is that they all include her.